Fourth

First of all, your first baby would never sleep on the floor.

Your second baby will fall asleep on the floor, and you will immediatly pick them up and place them in their warm cozy bed.

The third baby will fall asleep, and you will leave them there. But not without first wrapping them in a blanket, drawing the blinds shut, and ushering everyone else out of the room until said baby wakes.

Fourth baby? You won't even know where the baby is because the two eldest children are surrounding the blaring television, while your third child runs up and down the stairs with a house full of friends, all happening while you are scheduling appointments over the phone, and your husband is mowing the lawn while all the windows are open.



I know, I know. You won't be that kind of a mom.

Well, then you better come over and fix this babe's diaper so it covers her right but cheek, 'cause I sure as heck 'aint touching her while she's sleeping.